falling sickness.

one.

he reminded you of comets colliding and holding your breath underwater and bedtime stories. he was your rainbow, your sunny sky, your ledge to hold onto and the song you fell asleep listening to each night.

you couldn't get him out of your head.

you didn't even want to.


two.

there was no choice, no other option. there was nothing - nothing but him and the promises in his eyes and the whispers from his lips.

there was nothing but falling.


three.

he made you smile, made you laugh, made you want to live again. the two of you would go to the park just to watch the shadows chase each other on the ground. he'd hold your hand and tell you pretty words, and you believed every one of them.

his breath was like autumn wind, soft and sweet, and he was the only thing that would chase your nightmares away.

you didn't realize that he was the nightmare.


four.

he was the water and salty tears. he was the waves, pulling you under, begging you to surrender. he was the sweet breeze hiding the terror underneath, and he was the memory you never wanted to forget. he was the sand sticking between your toes that you only half-wanted to get rid of but never could.

he was the ocean.

but the ocean drowns everyone eventually.


five.

he was your parachute, stopping you from falling, stopping you from crashing.

but your parachute broke; let you go.

and now there is only falling.